By Wan Shui
People sometimes wonder, what’s a happy family? In a happy family people do not argue right or wrong.
Many people like to blame family conflicts on trivial things and argue over who is right or wrong. There is a saying in The Simpsons: “My dear, if you are too victorious, you will never be happy.”
There once was an old couple that whenever they quarreled, the husband always let his wife win the argument. One day the wife asked: “I knew I was wrong, why did you let me.” The husband said: “Because I’m afraid if I won an argument, I may hurt your feelings, eventually lose our trust and love!
Unfortunately, many people do not understand this type of wisdom and always try to force other people to give up their opinion. For example, if one wants to go outside to eat, another one will dismiss that restaurant food may not be healthy; If one admires the beautiful ocean, the other will reveal that many people drowned in the sea; if one wants to enroll in a class in the nearby school, another will insist the cost-free online class is better. Who is right or wrong over such small details? In fact, there is nothing wrong, but different views.
Family members may need to learn that there is no absolute wrong among family members. Even though some of their behaviors don’t fit your standard or don’t look good in front of others, we must try to understand their daily environment, think about how they developed their habits, and make a call if their decisions will be absolutely harmful. If not, it is no longer a big deal.
There are no two people who have exactly the same views. Among family members, there will always be such a difference. More important is to understand each other and do not hold anyone wrong. Knowing how to quit the family “battlefield” is by no means being a deserter, but a wise move. Home is a place of love, not a place for reasoning and debate.